"Where are you going, my little one, little one?
Where are you going, my baby, my own?
Turn around and you're two,
Turn around and you're four,
Turn around and you're a young girl going out of the door."
It's just crazy when you think about it sometimes. Mary turned 3 in October. We had a small pizza party for her with a few family and friends.
It seems ages ago when SHE was the infant that I was nursing. And yet, it was only three years ago. So much has happened in those three years. I have this little person now. She's exuberant and beautiful. She's smart and charming. She's sweet and sassy and funny and fun.
I love her so much. I hope I can be everything I need to be so that she can be happy.
Since Jonathan has been born, things have changed some.... Initially I - all of a sudden - expected more from her. I expected her to be able to dress herself for instance. And I realized that she still needed my help and that I couldn't just expect things to change overnight.....
She has taken to being a big sister rather well. Of course we have times when she isn't perfect -But she is 3! She really loves Jonathan. She tries to help with him. She sings to him, hugs and kisses him, and plays with him.
I feel divided. And I don't really like that feeling. I don't like having to wake up Jonathan so I can take Mary to an outing. I don't like not being able to attend to Mary so I can go nurse Jonathan. I sometimes feel like I have to take something from one to give something to the other. As I'm writing this, I'm realizing how badly I've felt about that....
BUT, one of the reasons I wanted to have another child was so that Mary would learn that the universe doesn't always revolve around her. And too, it is good for her to fend for herself a bit. And truth be told, I don't think she has ever felt badly about it. She has always been independent - able to play on her own and entertain herself. So I guess that is good.
My biggest challenge that I have with Mary right now is getting her dressed every day. She almost never willingly does it. I've tried several things from time-outs (and spankings - which as you probably remember are not what I like to do.... they kind of go against my parenting philosophy) to rewards, to timers, to letting her pick what to wear.... Nothing has really done the trick. But I'm just going to keep trying. I hope I'm being a good parent. I hope that all this is normal and that as she gets older, these things will get better.
In the mean-time, I'm hoping I can focus on how truly wonderful she is and enjoy every second with her and relish it. Because one day she'll be all grown up and I won't get to be with her as much.
"Where are you going, my little one, little one?
Little dirndls and petticoats, my baby my own?
Turn around and you're tiny,
Turn around and you're grown,
Turn around and you're a young wife with babes of your own."
I love you my Dear, Sweet Mary Pie! I love being your Momma!!!
Mary about 3 months old
Mary around 9 months old
Mary 1 year old
Mary 2 years old
Mary with one of her birthday presents - matching outfits with her dolly.
Mary's Official 3 Years Old Photo
A pic my friend Sara took - more about this session later. But here Mary is in her long ballet tutu dress up she got for Christmas. Doesn't she look like an angel?
Happy 3rd Birthday Mary!!!
Annie, I remember going to library story times with little Celia all prettied up and taking silent note of other children all awry. Not meaning to judge..but possibly doing so :) and then more children came along ... And those who would.not.cooperate.period...and now I can't help but laugh when I show up somewhere with someone in pjs :)
ReplyDeleteAnd happy birthday to Mary!
ReplyDeleteThe divide of two is hard. The pay off of two teenage friends priceless! I love the look back you give me to those days :)
Thanks Marlowe. That is nice to hear. BTW, I added two more photos of Mary to this post incase you're interested.
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